time can only tell

I want to say this holiday weekend has been such an emotional drain for me. Like a wet towel you just keep twisting and twisting till there isn't anymore water left. On my thanksgiving my boyfriend choose to ruin any good for me. I wrote in my previos blog all these wonderful things about him and he just chooses to focus on the past like WTF!? Ruined my day so we made up later that night but the next day my friend was having a get together and I really wanted him to just go and chill with all of us. He gets upset of one little thing and it just completely turns to shit! He embarasses me infront of all of my friends! Makes me chase him to the otherside of the neighborhood. If there's one thing you should know about my boyfriend is that he's one for dramatics ... We both are haha. Then it's this whole scene. I get bruised and my wrist hurt my boyfriend and are so upset and I was just like I can't take anymore of this hurt! I break up with him and am so fed up you don't and can't even imagine! I let him have it. It's all laid out there now. He has nothing to say but he's hurt so I come down from my cloud of rage and cater to him because regaurdless I love this man. He's the love of my life and some people fuck up but you can't let you from being human and seeing when its too much. So I take him home and he asks for a few days to change and I am a sucker for this guy and let him have the days. Then the next day it's like WTF again! At first it was a little thing but then that night it was too much. It was done for real so I thought his insecurities that lead to constant flirtation and disrespecting our realtionship was a no no. And just so much hurting on my part I couldn't take neither deserved it. If someone devoted themselves to you then why would you want to push them away? I'll admit it I'm the biggest bitch when provoked but never have I stopped loving/caring. He just needs to work his shit out. I need sometime off. So we called it a break.and I'll leave it at that till something comes up? It's actually our 10month anniversary coming up,sucks.

It's like that quote I live mylife by. "forget how you feel and remember what you deserve."


- tiffani$$